Shattered Rainbows

Molten echoes of discontent
Flit through the fragile silence
And swirling simplicity
Of my wonderment about

...whether there's a purpose
for the distance
           the silence and resistance
I display toward everyone else
So that I can analyze it all
Keep the world away from myself
And never fall

...into those traps
which keep others blind
things like
love & hate & anger & fear
which would only consume me
were I really here

pettiness & prettiness
and earthly violence
the tragedy of lack of mystery
that inner putrid pestilence

Between the pleasure and the pain
Like the space between my eyes
Where I can see but only
Cross-eyed and dizzily confused
Convinced that there is a key to happiness
A mystery no one is sharing
Which could make me numb to this
Earthly toil - which could keep me from
despairing

Until I stop trying to focus on
All that which I can't see
And notice
The temporal fragility
And steady inconstancy
And complexity
Of earthly beauty

...I'd rather feel the pinpricks
of the stars upon my skin
than lose myself in numbness
trap myself and just give in

and allow
the milky dew
of branching madness
to drip and drool
and seep into my sound mind
leaving it discoloured,
disenchanted, disillusioned
         and vacated

         all this reaching and searching
will finally culminate in a grasping
                        of hands
and this elusive, floating spirit
                 will rise and fall
as slivers of light, distributed randomly.

Ily, 2001