Closed-Eye Disillusions

I don't have illusions

I lost them on my way

and I used to have confusion

but what can I say

So many things are clear to me

I wish I didn't understand

How these little games work

or about this sleight of hand

I wish I could believe in love

the way that I once did

but innocence left me years ago

I'm not a little kid

I have contradictions and dichotomies

and many other strange tendencies

But some days a lobotomy

would seem preferable to these

One thing I'll say about clarity

sometimes it's good to close my eyes

then I don't have to see

your lips move as you tell lies

Then I can open them

and pretend it was a dream

because it's easier than watching you

say all the things that you don't mean

ily, 2004